Friday, January 18, 2013

Pregnancy Woes | Volume 1

As many of you know I used to spend hours obsessing over everything baby back in day.  I knew so much back then that I've either blocked out over the years or simply forgotten due to lack of need for that knowledge.  So now that I am pregnant I feel like I'm starting from scratch and the most clueless pregnant person in the world.

The past few months have greeted me with some great surprises and some very interesting woes.  I'm sure as the months go on I will have many more Pregnancy Woes, so we'll just call this Volume 1: The first trimester.

1) Dentist: The Impossible Journey
Dental Work: Ain't all it's cracked up to be.
-I take meticulous care of my teeth.  I did not let my parents fork over $5K for dental work when I was 19 for nothing, my chompers are in pristine condition.  I brush and floss religiously and still wear my nasty old retainer at night.  So when I bit into a delicious Florida's Naturals Organic Nugget the other day and realized I was chewing on something hard as a rock I was SHOCKED to learn it was a piece of my back molar. 

Turns out that between the pregnancy hormone and my right side being my chewing dominant side, I took the ridge of my molar clear off leaving a nice big hold in my tooth.  I was assured this happens to most adults (well, most grind them down over their lifetime, I just like to be different).  The problem?  When you're pregnant dental work becomes something else entirely.  Trying to get an appointment at Western Dental was like trying to pull teeth (pun intended) but my totally awesome midwife practice came to my rescue and got me in to the Feather River Dental Group, which has alternative solutions for pregnant women.  They put a temporary cap on my tooth and I went on my merry way.  But I spent the better part of a day trying to find a dentist who would see me without a doctor's release since I hadn't seen my midwife officially yet.  I even went as far as going in to Urgent Care only to be told they couldn't treat pregnant women.  I understand this, but at the same time it was a great time suck of a day.

Thank God it happened during my semester break.  I can't imagine dealing with that in between classes or on my day off.

2) Allergy Med Confusion
-I am going to chalk this one up to "I'm an idiot" combined with "that really nice OB who did my free dating ultrasound at the women's center is not an idiot, he just didn't know".  When I first got that positive pee test I stopped taking everything cold turkey, which included my allergy meds.  Google is great for some things, but for matters of pregnancy I prefer to talk to the experts.  So when I went in for the ultrasound a week after the most shocking night of my life I asked my doctor about taking my Zyrtec allergy meds.  His response was that he recommends clients take Allegra or Claretin because they've been studies more.  Neither of those really work for me so rather than take something that doesn't work I opted for nothing at all.  A few days of allergy issues really weren't that big of a deal.

But then I had a nutrition meeting at my midwifes center and was informed that Zyrtec is actually OK for pregnant women, and she actually suggests you avoid Allegra.  In the end, I just decided to take the Zyrtec when I needed it, and really didn't take it until very late in the first tri.

3) Monster Boobs
Boobs: It's What's For Dinner
-I know breast growth happens during pregnancy.  NO ONE told me it could be this insane during the first trimester.  32C to 34DD.  Over share?  Whatever.  I wish I'd known!  I practically had a heart attack when I went in to be fitted.  My mom thought it was hilarious.  Yes, yes.  REAL funny.  But, it made a great Christmas present for the hubby.

4) Holy Crap I'm Needy!
-This was worse when my m/s (which came at night, by the way) was worse.  I was so obnoxiously needy!  All the time.  Usually I'm cool with my hubs going over to a friends house after work or class and hanging out, but when I needed him I NEEDED him.  Not to do anything special, either.  I literally just wanted him in the room with me.  I don't think he particularly liked this phase.

5) Here a Fart, There a Fart, Everywhere a Fart Fart
Oh stop it, Boo, it wasn't THAT bad!
-I could provided a base beat with the amount I fart.  Seriously.  Luckily it's not the smelly kind except this one time when we had asparagus on Christmas Eve and I legitimately thought I'd killed my dog.   Luckily, having three dogs around makes it easy to blame it on them.  It didn't matter what I ate, it was inevitable. 


 And the highlight of the first trimester...

6) The Dry Heave: An Experiment in Embarrassment
-I've posted about the dry heaving in my weekly journals, but I feel it deserves a special place on this list for being the single most annoying thing about my first trimester.  Everything else I can easily laugh off, this I can laugh off but I still give it an annoying side-eye.  It could come on unexpectedly, often in public places, and make people look at me like was a leper.  I'm sure many were thinking "OMG GO TO THE BATHROOM!!" but since it wasn't accompanied by puking like a normal heaving fit, I usually decided to just stay put and let it pass.  Screw you, public.  I have no decency and don't want to leave my table at this nice restaurant, thank you!

Now of course this may not happen to you and may not have happened to you during your pregnancy.  I'm sure many of my readers can relate to some things and had some I didn't list on here because I didn't experience.  All pregnancies are different.  This is just a look at things that may (or may not) come for you if you are just finding out your pregnant.  It's not all bad.  Some things are humorous (if you're a fart joke sort of lady) and other things are just annoying.  All in all, I didn't love the first trimester, but I didn't hate the whole thing, either.

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